Weird eBay auctions on Who Would Buy That?


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We love hearing about weird eBay auctions, so if you find any please tell us! Closed auctions are fine, and so are items from other auction websites.

We accept lots of different things, but please don't submit:
- anything with the words "fart" or "gag" in the title
- kangaroo scrotum purses
- joke auctions that have already been listed many times (mystery auctions, ad space on body parts, 'haunted' items, Virgin Mary or Jesus images on food/rocks/etc.)

Also, please don't send attachments or HTML, just URLs of funny eBay auctions, and tell us why you think the items are worthy.

So. Found an amusing, unusual or downright bizarre eBay auction? Send it in!

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Saturday, April 30, 2005

11:06 AM | link

Penn Hills Senior High School's 2005 production of "Waterworld" was hailed by the critics as a low budget success.

(thanks, Eric!)

10:46 AM | link

Like the song says, "love stinks".

(thanks, BBQers!)

10:32 AM | link

frig·id   (frjd)   adj.
1. Lacking warmth of feeling.
2. Stiff and formal in manner.
3. Stone cold.

(thanks, Derek!)

10:30 AM | link

Don't worry, lady - in another 10 years she'll replace the baby bottle with a beer bottle.

(thanks, dummieballs!)

10:28 AM | link

And you thought oysters were an aphrodisiac...

(thanks, Randy!)

10:26 AM | link

Harold was worried about his wife's diet, especially the excessive amount of salt she put on all her food.

(thanks, John!)

10:21 AM | link

How convenient: "I don't know to much about time machines or electronics, but from my observations I believe that the machine ... is now in a non working condition."

(And speaking of time machines...)

(thanks to everyone who submitted these!)

Saturday, April 23, 2005

6:41 PM | link

Apparently the whole "haunted auction" thing is still alive, so to speak - at least, judging by the number of haunted submissions we receive. It's a bit done to death (haha), but clearly the genre still has its fans. So, without further ado, here's the latest batch of ghostly goodies up for grabs on eBay:

  • Haunted clock radio
  • Haunted bra
  • Haunted $1 bill
  • Haunted spittoon
  • Haunted talking brown paper bag
  • Haunted doll
  • Another haunted doll
  • And another haunted doll
  • And yet another haunted doll
  • Haunted slides
  • Haunted shorts
  • Haunted vintage camera
  • Haunted old lady's earrings
  • Haunted candy dish
  • Haunted Spongebob Squarepants
  • Haunted necklace
  • Haunted painting
  • Haunted toaster
  • Haunted shoes
  • Haunted toast (Satanic, too)
  • Haunted Grateful Dead t-shirt
  • Haunted Ramen
  • Haunted house in Georgia
  • Haunted car
  • Haunted iPod
  • Haunted Barbie doll
  • Haunted mystery box
  • Haunted wedding dress
  • Haunted bell
  • Haunted Virgin Mary statue
  • Haunted Jesus picture from a haunted funeral home
  • And finally, for variety's sake, a cursed crystal

  • (thanks, Rebekah, Darin, Steven, Susan, jadm5000, debbie, Kathie, Jason, Bob, Karen, DJ, Pat, Mark, shebaqueen, Ed, Mr. Jones, Sue, Dawn, penguin, Michelle, greengirl, Tony, Rich, Eugene and John!)

    6:39 PM | link

    What better way to promote the World's Nastiest Underwear than with the world's nastiest description?

    (thanks, Ginny!)

    6:35 PM | link

    Why you should never leave your diaphragm unattended.

    6:29 PM | link

    Salt and pepper usually make a meal more appetizing. But not always.

    (thanks, Andrew!)

    Tuesday, April 19, 2005

    8:21 PM | link

    Sue couldn't afford to buy an antler chandelier, so she set her sights a little lower.

    8:11 PM | link

    Maybe a company that sells birth control pills will win the auction.

    (thanks, Alexis!)

    8:10 PM | link

    Is your secret "I lead an incredibly boring life and have way too much time on my hands"?

    (thanks, Danny!)

    8:00 PM | link

    (And speaking of His Holiness... the man is dead. Couldn't you at least wear clean footwear to his funeral?)

    7:59 PM | link

    First, we highly doubt that the late Pope John Paul II is suddenly appearing in people's mirrors. And second, if he is, don't you think he'd find one that's a little bit nicer?

    (thanks, Jared!)

    7:56 PM | link

    Want to sell your car? Make sure you shoot lots of blurry photos from skewed Batman camera angles.

    (thanks, Ron!)

    7:35 PM | link

    "Hey, did you hear? The boss is taking the whole company to the Grand Canyon for a week!"

    "Alright! A week away from the office!"

    "Uh, not exactly."

    (thanks, Jet!)

    7:33 PM | link

    Welcome to heaven. Here are your wings, your harp, and your nipples.

    (thanks, Ann!)

    Monday, April 18, 2005

    7:08 PM | link

    The perfect gift for the next baby shower you attend.

    Especially if you hate the baby.

    Saturday, April 09, 2005

    6:12 PM | link

    We have no idea what they're selling, but the auction has a picture of a monkey so it must be clever.

    (thanks, Caressa!)

    6:10 PM | link

    And speaking of fruit that looks like animals...

    (thanks, Jason!)

    6:09 PM | link

    The Echidna (also known as the Spiny Anteater) is a primitive, egg-laying mammal that lives in Australia. And occasionally it turns up disguised as a small coconut.

    (thanks, Lee!)

    6:06 PM | link

    Did you ever wish you could introduce two sellers?

    (thanks, Billy!)

    Thursday, April 07, 2005

    3:00 PM | link

    More crimes of fashion: "This jacket has "IT", it's got the "WOW FACTOR" that many of us glitzy divas crave!" (Glitzy divas in New Orleans, you get your own special jacket.)

    Here's a shirt for the gal who just loves the look of tire tracks across her chest.

    And if you've ever dreamed of having Cher wrapped around your leg, these jeans are for you.

    And finally, what man doesn't like to think there's a raging bull in his trousers?

    2:55 PM | link

    Proceeds from this auction will be used to pay for my son's therapy, which he'll need a lot of after having been forced to wear these overalls throughout his childhood.

    Wednesday, April 06, 2005

    9:52 AM | link

    "What could be more dope than a thong to remember the Pope?"

    Tuesday, April 05, 2005

    6:15 AM | link

    Let's play a little Jeopardy! -- WWBT-style.

    Buttons, bobbleheads, programs, t-shirts, ticket stubs, and autographed photos.

    What tacky items are sold at baseball parks on opening day, in arenas at rock concerts, and on eBay after the death of a Pope?

    (oh but that we were kidding)

    5:38 AM | link

    Martha thought her husband's new soldering gun was a harmless toy until the day she discovered all her silverware was missing.

    (thanks, bear!)

    5:30 AM | link

    Forget condoms, IUDs and the pill. This story is the best birth control we've ever seen.

    (thanks, Beej, for reminding us why we don't have kids!)

    5:19 AM | link

    Sometimes you AREN'T what you eat: "I almost ate what may be a miracle on earth."

    (thanks, Marcus!)

    Friday, April 01, 2005

    8:19 PM | link

    Maybe she's crying because people keep saying they've seen her in grilled cheese sandwiches.

    (thanks, Terry!)

    7:39 PM | link

    "Garfield The Creepy Perverted Cat Withdrawn Riding Toy".

    (thanks, Corey!)

    7:36 PM | link

    There's camping, and then there's "camping."

    (thanks, Gregg!)

    7:27 PM | link

    Haunted dolls and ad space on your forehead are, like, sooooo last week - all the cool kids are now selling the naming rights to their babies and houses and pets and stomach tumors and... uh...

    (thanks, Jason!)

    7:03 PM | link

    Terri Schiavo may be resting in peace, but there's no sleep for legions of eBayers looking to make a quick buck from her death.

    Most are offering the usual memorabilia, like magazines and domain names. But wait, it gets even weirder: you can also buy cufflinks and fan art, a letter from Michael Schiavo and possibly the most tasteless souvenir imaginable: a feeding tube crucifix.

    (thanks to all who contributed to this!)

    (also, while we have your attention, please make sure you have a living will.)

    6:58 PM | link

    Some cooks have separate cutting boards for meat, poultry, seafood and produce. Oh yes, and human flesh.

    (thanks, Claire!)


    Most auctions are removed by the auction sites after 90 days so to avoid dead links, we archive only a few months at a time.

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    Steal our stuff and we'll beat you senseless.